I Fear

My mouth fears
not having an answer for
all the Whos and the Whats
that make up the
world I live in.

My ear fears
the definitive Yes and
the absolute No that
steal the spotlight from
my insecure Maybe. 

My head fears
your doing of good and
my thinking of truth will
never meet face to face.

My heart fears
the way I loved you
only crippled you and
deepened your hatred of me.

My soul fears
my prayers have been offered
to an audience of none and that
the God I worship was merely
a fantasy of the mind.

My past fears
the impulse to
seek Death will return and
again defeat my
desire for Life.

My future fears
there could’ve been
a me and a you but too soon
I
gave
up 
because I hated finding out
about me from you.

I fear
there’s nothing I can do
about everything I fear.